You know the drill. Leave us your answer with optional explanation in the comments.
Today's "would you rather" is based on two real life stories. I'll be very brief. (I'll get the details as close as I can remember hearing them.)
First: My friend Petie, living in a small apartment in Lexington, Kentucky, was asleep, dreaming that his girlfriend's bird was nibbling on his chin. (I think his girlfriend actually owned a pet bird at the time.) He woke up to find none other than a damn BAT on his face. Waking in a start, the bat fell off, crawled under the door and into the living room. He and his roommate then had to go into battle in the middle of the night.
Second: There is an urban legend about giant sewer rats that climb up in your sewer pipes, and are waiting in your toilet when you open the lid, (most likely in the middle of the night, when you are least alert and off your guard. Mwahahahahaha!) Allegedly, this has actually happened.
So, would you rather wake up with a bat on your face, or go to the toilet in the middle of the night only to be shocked by a giant sewer rat within dangerous biting range of your most precious assets.
Remember, in both cases, you have this thing in your house, so you actually have to deal with it. You are home alone. No spouses to the rescue. Which would you rather deal with?
This: Or this:
8 comments:
I helped fight that bat, and I'll take that over rabid vermin gnawing at my nether regions any day (or in the middle of any night).
My thoughts are as follows:
1) According to movies, our most reliable sources of information, a sewer rat is likely to possess secret ninja skills which, consequently, he has taught to a band of reptilian brothers. Now, should I battle this ninja rat and actually win, I would then have to face his young charges. I'm not sure I have enough pizza to thwart them.
2) There are only two threatening movie bats known to man. The first is the vile kidnapper from the Great Mouse Detective, and he is on crutches. I think I can take a lame bat. The second is batman, and he can nibble my chin in the dead of night any day of the week.
Either way, I'm going with the bat.
Emily: BAHAHAHAHAHA!
Jonny AND Emily: Sadly, you are not the first in the long line of Walls philosophers/deep thinkers/"What if"-ers/"Would you rather"-ers...I VIVIDLY recall my dad (your Uncle John...the one you're named for...THAT GUY) asking me, "Would you rather climb a mountain of razor blades or swim in a river of snot?" I might have been 12 or 13 at the time. I wouldn't answer HIM then. I won't answer YOU now.
I think something is wrong with our family.
You just had to make the picture of the rat cuter than the picture of the bat. Regardless, I'd rather deal with the bat. They fly and I can shoo them out a window or door and they're gone. A rat would scuttle under things and I wouldn't know where it went. Also, I lived in a cabin in Wyoming for a summer that had many mice, and on more than one occasion I felt them crawl over me in the middle of the night. Flying things over crawling things, end of story.
I find it hard to believe the rat actually made it that far... and i hope i'm right. Besides, what would its motivation be? Anyway, i'd rather have the bat. Rats are just crasty (creep-nasty).
Having had a bat in the house years ago, and still bearing a few psychological scars, I'd go with the unknown: the rat. I'm already paranoid about toilets. They're already gross. No big surprises there, I've heard too many missionary stories. But you can't get over a bat on your face. You just can't.
Bat, not rat.
Rat on your ass or bat on your face...hmmm. Rat, more people see your face than your butt, and having the rabies is no picnic.
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